If your reading this, it’s not too late. You can still wish me a happy birthday. Yasssss, I’m finally 21 and it feels good.

It’s taken me a while to get to where I am today. I acknowledge that I could have gone down a number of different paths and would have had a totally different outcome. Statistics say numerous amount of things and so far I can proudly say, I’ve beaten them.

Life hasn’t been easy but I’ve never been expectant of too much. I’m 21 and a moment of reflection has reminded me of the hurdles I’ve conquered.

Heres a letter to my younger self:

Dear Akira,

Has anyone told you that life’s greatest lessons are learnt through the toughest of times. Things might leave you confused, angry and hurt but don’t be frightened, it will make you who you are today.

I want to tell you to close your eyes. You’ll see things beyond your years and capacity to comprehend. But if you close your eyes, you won’t learn from the mistakes. So instead I’ll advice you to keep one eye open.

Your obsessive, loving, strong, addictive personality is something that won’t diminish through the storm. In fact you will not only find it a useful coping mechanism but something you will learn to use as key to open doors for yourself and for others.

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Your plans to conquer the world are still in process. Fuelled by loss you’ll soon understand that what don’t break you, makes you. Do not kill yourself trying to put the pieces together. You are still growing. work hard you’ll see your sisters again soon.

There’s nothing I can say to you that would ever prepare you for the loss of your mother. Hold on and stay close to God. He will save you. I know it may seem as though you’ve come to a dead end but now you have more reason to flourish.
Your mum loved you, she knew you loved her. Your not to blame. You are your mothers success.

Girl, I know it may not seem like it but there is light at the end of the tunnel. We haven’t yet reached the end but I can see it. The journey along the way is still yet to be easy but to be honest it’s nothing you can’t handle. Trust me, I know. I’ve lived it to tell you the tale.

Akira, Akira, Akira lol school is a time for learning and growth. Despite our amazing ability to chat and get the work done at the same time. You’ll find that life would be a lot easier without parent meetings and detentions.

Let me also mention that life would also be a lot easier with out boys. LOOL stay away. No, don’t go there. I’m telling you, you’ll find the one.

We think we’ve found the one. It’s not perfect. But you love each other. only time can tell.
The absence of your father has left an obscure but yet clear perception of men and a thin between everything you don’t want and everything you deserve. This will subconsciously lead you to stupid decisions. During this time you’ll keep your worries to yourself. Today, I would tell you to speak to someone. It may feel as though you’ll carry the bag of burden forever but it’s a relief to say it has been a while since we have put that bag down.

Your encouraged to look after your physical health. Your emotional well being is just as important. You’ll often feel as though your need of help is not recognised but I can assure you, your not alone. You’ll get used to the frequent up and downs and will deal with it appropriately.

Today you are at uni. Stay focused. You’ve achieved so much, your nearly there.
Your currently finding it hard to stay motivated. But from this day, every time I struggle to focus I’ll read this letter.
Keep volunteering and stepping out your comfort. It opens doors.
We currently have a thing for travelling. It’s important. Growth is important, keep growing.
The sky is your limit.
We’ve got 2 businesses, keep pushing it.

Finally, I would like to say. We said we will be a millionaire by 21. It’s ok, we haven’t got there yet. Don’t be discouraged. Life is nothing like you would have imagined but things could have been a lot worse. Count your blessings, better days are coming.

Love, your 21 year old self.

Akira-Kay x

Sc: Itskiraah

twitter/Ig: AkiraKay_

photpgraphy by : ig – @jdsk_productions –

styled by: ig – @styledbylavish

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